Fragments of Healing

Shame is relative with matters of the heart, but is guilt truly inevitable?

Is it that easy to break a person’s will or heart?

Who is the mender of both?

Does the heart know when the palpitations will come?

You’re strong, they say.

I was once broken;

It was temporary.

I became emotionally indifferent so I could function.

It took looking at the one I loved, that tears didn’t mean weakness.

From her eyes, I learned more about pain than I could ever feel.

I hugged and felt vulnerable.

At that point, I gained a deeper understanding of emotions I thought were long gone—

Anger, grief, pain, hurt, love.

I long turned my mind into a prison where the light couldn’t come through.

I told myself I’d keep you for the melody,

Though I knew deep down all you wanted to do was fly.

Pragmatically speaking, I was tired of the music; it was too loud.

Emotionally speaking, I would listen till my ears bled.

I opened my mouth to console and reassure.

Only then did I realize that I was still heartbroken and had never healed,

And I was in more pain than I cared to admit.